Long After I Am Gone

The past year of my life has been spent reflecting on the past and embarking on a journey of self discovery and self care. I am inviting new things into my life and expelling things that are no longer useful. Perhaps we become more graceful as we embrace the fluidity of life- it's ebb and flow. Our hearts grow larger as we forgive ourselves for past choices and make room for new ones. As we remove our bandages from pains endured, we experience the newness birthed beneath the gauze- skin that is beautiful, strong and less sensitive than before. As I spend moments during the day caring for myself, accusatory thoughts assault me, as they do every mother. Nevertheless, I continue on this road and choose to banish those thoughts. I believe what now appear to be fleeting moments of extravagance, will result in lasting memories for my daughter. Memories of the overwhelming fragrance of rosemary that lingers in the air while she produces art work and I bathe, will leave a stamp on her heart. My hope is that she will indulge herself in the beauty surrounding her. Embossed on her soul, will be hugs accompanied by the scent of my Lily of the Valley perfume, on which our money could have been more wisely spent. Perhaps she will be inspired when she smells rosemary and comforted by the breeze of a Lilly bouquet long after I am gone.